Christian sexual purity dating
He wants you to think purity before God is not kissing or not taking off clothes or not having oral sex or not “going all the way.” He wants you to think that if you don’t cross a certain line, you’re staying pure.The problem with this kind of thinking, however, is that Jesus says if we just lust in our heart we’ve sinned and stand condemned before God (Matt. Purity is much more about the posture of our hearts than the position of our bodies. ” question may reveal a desire to get as close to sin as possible instead of a desire to flee as our Lord calls us to (1 Cor. When we compromise sexually, we’re showing the other person we’re willing to use and abuse them to get what makes us happy. So much of their dating relationship was engulfed in the cycle of sin, shame, and start-over that they never developed a mature, battle-tested trust for each other.Every time we push the boundaries with our fiancée or lead her into sin we are communicating, though we don’t mean to, “You can’t trust me because I’m willing to use and disregard you to get what I want.” This is certainly one of Satan’s deadliest strategies, and the one I suspect hurt Tim and Jess the most. It’s important to point out, however, that when we resist sexual sin, God blesses a relationship with the exact opposite effect.
Treat your date as a subject to listen to and understand and appreciate, not an object to experiment with, conquer or satisfy your desires. Avoid fast moving relationships and instant intimacy. A car moving too fast is likely to swerve out of control when it hits a slick spot. Know what you’re doing and either stick with the plan or go somewhere safe, where you’re in the sight of others (particularly others who respect the need for purity). Determine to stay away from the setup, rather than putting yourself in the setup and having to call on your convictions when your resistance is at its lowest, and you’re most likely to give in. Be accountable to someone about your physical relationship.
Normally, premarital sexual activity is like gas on fire. There’s still passion, and there’s still intense feelings and emotions—but sex in marriage is based primarily on the hot coals of trust, devotion, and sacrifice (1 Cor. Couples who built their sexual expectations on passion provided by the forbidden fruit are often disappointed and confused when sex is different in marriage. It’s the man’s responsibility to care for his future wife by leading her toward Jesus and away from sin, darkness, and the pain of evil. Don’t let your relationship remain unexamined by other godly Christians. If you have fallen into sexual sin, today is the day to plead for mercy and turn to Christ in faith.
Passion is high, feelings are intense, and the drive to go further is fueled by the knowledge you shouldn’t (Rom. My wife and I laughed at this idea when our premarital counselor shared it with us. But almost six years and three kids later, he was right. If he sets the wrong pattern here, he’ll be digging out for years afterward—and may never regain the ground he loses apart from God’s grace. Both of you should have a godly couple or group of faithful friends who hold you accountable. May God give us mercy to pursue purity for his glory and our good.
Their laughter had dulled, and their distance had grown. Though Tim and Jess are Christians, their dating and engagement were marked with sexual impurity.
Though the early days of their relationship had been fine, over time they made consistent compromises that developed into a deeper pattern of sexual sin.
Tim and Jess had only been married for eight months, but the honeymoon was most certainly over. As I unpacked some of the couple’s history, I discovered he hadn’t sabotaged them on their honeymoon, nor in the early months of figuring out married life.