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You've been together for years, raised kids and pets. As months drift into years, you realize: You're in a sexless marriage.Most married couples don't really know what to expect of a long-term relationship, says Diane Solee, MSW, a former marriage counselor who is the founder and director of It may not happen all the time, but it happens often.It's because people start to feel neglected, disappointed.
"This isn't the kind of thing in this day and age that people live with," she says.Those are really big problems, and you've got to tend to them." A sharp tongue is a red flag of growing frustration in a passionless marriage, Schwartz adds."If you're bitchy, if you treat each other with contempt, it's a warning sign.Very often, couples are headed toward a bigger disconnect in the marriage -- and possibly divorce, says Pepper Schwartz, Ph D, professor of sociology, psychiatry, and behavioral medicine at the University of Washington in Seattle.Schwartz is on the Health Advisory Board at Web MD, and author of several books including Prime: Adventures and Advice about Sex, Love, and the Sensual Years.
a renewal of what this marriage is supposed to be." First step: Be realistic.