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For many sugar daddies, the idea of hiring a prostitute is unpalatable—they don’t like the open acknowledgement that a woman is with them for the money or that she is, very possibly, faking her sexual pleasure. They often like to see themselves as the white knight—the guy who makes it possible for a young woman to go to school, get her dream job or experience a chic lifestyle that would otherwise be unattainable. Sugar daddies have been around probably as long as the world’s oldest profession.
The term gained modern-day traction with the 2002 publication of a popular how-to book by Leidra Lawson, an Atlanta-based veteran sugar baby, who leads workshops on how to navigate the sugar world and appears at sex conventions and conferences.
Whatever the prudes think, the lifestyle is catching on. Established Men’s membership has grown by more than 80 per cent each of the past two years.
It has 79,000 members in the GTA (accounting for one third of its Canadian membership); roughly 26,000 of those are men and 53,000 are women.
Each site offers the same core service: to help financially strapped young women meet older men who want to shower them with gifts, travel and cash.
Seeking Arrangement also asks women to include their ideal monthly allowance in their profiles; men are asked to include their yearly income, net worth and monthly sugar baby spending budget.
“Before going inside a restaurant, conduct a car check to see how many fancy cars and limos are parked outside,” she wrote.
Now 25, she’s earning enough to pay her rent but not enough to support the lifestyle she imagined for herself.
Lawson still receives speaking requests and fan emails, but much of her book’s practical advice has become obsolete.
Now, when you Google “sugar daddy,” hundreds of websites pop up.
Whatever they do, or don’t do, her sugar daddy always hands her 0 at the end of the encounter.
He slips it into her hand, delicate as a sparrow’s wing, and says, “For you.” Olivia sees it as a gentlemanly gesture; she never negotiated the amount, though many sugar babies do. If that’s what he wanted, she says, he could go somewhere else.
’ and ‘What sort of value am I adding to their life?